“You’ll feel like you’re bouncing on the face of luxury. ….”
The Wine Curmudgeon has long lamented wine’s lack of marketing acumen, where Orson Welles and the Roo are considered state of the art. Little did I know that Saturday Night Live’s 2013 cast figured it out, too.
Vanessa Bayer and Cecily Strong are spot on taking off every silly luxury wine commercial we’ve poked fun at on the blog (both puns fully intended). Yes, it’s a little long in the middle, since it is SNL, but not to worry: “Remember what bubbles sound like? Pfft … pfft… pfft. …”
And who knew Justin Timberlake could do comedy? “Monica and Chandler’s Champagne,” indeed.
Or, as the wine economist Mike Veseth has warned us: If we keep this up, wine will be like opera, something that interests only the rich and the privileged.
In fact, supply and demand does work for plays and music. It’s one reason why it costs $20 to see a community theater do “Hamlet” and it doesn’t cost more than a cover charge and some beer to watch a local band. There is lots of supply, and not nearly as much demand, compared to stars like Jackson and Timberlake.
So why the divergence between the best wine and the best live shows? The answer, I’m afraid, is that the people who produce the latter want to keep their products affordable. The least expensive tickets for Jackson and Timberlake are about $50, and you can’t get anything close to legendary in wine for $50. If fact, you can buy crappy wine for $50 without any trouble at all. The people behind theater and music understand, in a way wine doesn’t, that the future of their business depends on making it accessible to people who can’t afford the top ticket. In wine, it’s the other way around; if you can’t afford the top ticket, why should we bother with you?
That’s why the pre-teen and teenaged girls who will attend the Timberlake show will be buying his music for the rest of their lives. It doesn’t matter what I think of him, what their parents think of him, or what music critics think of him. It’s why one friend’s daughter, told she couldn’t go to the Timberlake show, has stopped speaking to her mother.
And it’s also why, when you talk to young people about wine, they don’t show anywhere near the same kind of loyalty and enthusiasm. Accessibility is all; otherwise, we’re going to turn into opera.