New Year’s wine predictions, wine advice, wine trends, and the like are as common as $10 grocery store merlot. How does the Wine Curmudgeon know this? Because I’m almost as guilty as everyone else in doing them — almost being the key, of course.
Hence this opportunity for you to make your own predictions, in the spirit of the very popular Do-it-yourself wine review. Just click on the drop-down menus and your resolutions for 2014 are set (although those of you who get the blog via email or on Facebook may have to go the website to use the menus).
In 2014, I’m going to drink:
the same kind of wine I drank in 2013, because wine is too confusing. different kinds of wine, but only if they have high scores, because wine is too confusing. whatever wine is on sale, because wine is too confusing. whatever wine will get me drunk. In 2014, I’m going to try to learn more about wine by:
drinking more and different kinds of wine, because the Wine Curmudgeon says I should, and he’ll get cranky if I don’t. subscribing to a Wine Magazine, because I like the new car ads. drinking the same kinds of wine I did in 2013, because wine is too confusing. In 2014, I’m going to spend:
the same amount of money on wine, because that’s all I can afford. more money on wine, because the Winestream Media says I should. less money on wine, because all I want to do is to get drunk anyway. In 2014, the most important wine trend will be:
sweet red wine and moscato, though I wouldn’t be caught dead drinking either of them. whatever the Winestream Media says it is, because wine is too confusing. that more of us are drinking wine that we like, and that we don’t care what others think — hopefully, anyway. In 2014, regional and local wine:
will become more popular than ever, as the drink local and eat local movements gain momentum. will still suck, and I know this without ever having to drink any of it. – wait a minute, you mean there’s wine that’s not from California? New Year’s resolution image from Joe’s Cafe and wine diet image from Chicane Pictures, using a Creative Commons license