Category:Wine advice

It’s a Wonderful Wine Life 2023

One last time: The WC’s holiday wine traditions, video and literary

I wrote three Christmas parodies during the blog’s run —  my take on “It’s a Wonderful Life,”  as well as A Wine Curmudgeon Christmas Carol and ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas: The cheap wine version. Needless to say, all are brilliant. And I should add that Eddie Murphy recently told Jimmy Kimmell he loves “It’s a Wonderful Life,” so I can only hope Eddie — and his pal, Dick Cavett — will like my version, too.

The video is the WC’s quintessential holiday wine advice video, made with the incomparable Michael Sansolo for the Private Label Manufacturers Association. This was supposed to be a series, but then the pandemic happened and my work with the association came to an end. Ah, but we came so close to making the WC a YouTube star.

The original video post ran here. The video is age-restricted, since it’s about alcohol, but click the link to watch it on YouTube.

Ask the WC 41: Final edition

Fans Wearing Yellow T-Shirts Watching a Match
“He’s really going to do it, isn’t he?”

This, the final edition, of Ask the WC: What to do after the blog ends

Because the customers always have questions, and the Wine Curmudgeon has answers.

Dear Jeff:
Is there anything we can do to get you to reconsider ending the blog? I understand your reasons, but there is an audience for what you do.
Loyal reader

Dear Loyal:
Thank you for the kind words, but no, not really. I checked with some very smart people, and we considered a variety of ways to keep the blog going (including asking Churro, the blog’s associate editor, to take my place). But, in the end, there just seems to be little reason to write about quality, affordable wine when the wine business has very little interest in making any.

Say it ain’t so, WC:
Who do you suggest we read instead of you?
Need suggestions

Dear Need:
My pal Dave McIntyre at the Washington Post is one of the best. Joe Roberts, the 1 Wine Dude, has the proper perspective on the wine business. And, perhaps surprisingly, there are still plenty of local newspaper types who write about the sorts of wines most of us drink..

Hey, Wine Curmudgeon:
Can’t believe you’re leaving. What will you miss the most?
Gobsmacked

Dear Gobsmacked:
You, and the rest of the blog’s readers. Yes, I long ago tired of the arguments about availability, but other than that, you’re the reason I did this for so long. You love wine as much as I do, and you want to find something to drink that doesn’t taste like it came from an industrial spigot.  How could I not appreciate that? And, though you didn’t ask, I won’t miss writing tasting notes. I’m almost giddy with the thought that I will never have to do it again.

More Ask the WC:
• Ask the WC 40: Gallup poll, premiumization, RTDs
• Ask the WC 39: Drinking less, affordable wine, cheap wine
• Ask the WC 38: More about negative reviews, inflation, availability

Photo: Juliano Ferreira via Pexels

Holiday wine gift guide 2023

Crepes and mulled wine at the Christmas market
“Will this pair with that Basque wine?”

The Wine Curmudgeon’s holiday wine gift guide 2023 — and don’t forget the cheap wine book

Not many holiday gift email suggestions from PR types this season, which was kind of surprising. But who needs those anyway, since they mostly push items that are unnecessary, expensive, or both?

Which we never have done on the blog. Quirky, maybe, but nothing more than that. And keep the blog’s wine gift buying guidelines in mind:

Wine Simple ($19): A sommelier (don’t hold that against him) writes a wine book that offers mostly straightforward advice. How often do we see that?

Tenuta Luisa Refosco ($21). Years ago, I tasted an Italian refosco, a red wine, at a wine lunch. This is fabulous, I said. Where can I buy it? Ha ha ha, everyone laughed. So I haven’t been able to write much about refosco since. But the Tenuta Luisa has decent availability, and it’s a fine example of the wine: Plum fruit, some pepper, and even savory.

Berroia Txakoli de Bizkaia ($24). Ole & Obrigado, the Spanish importer, has always delivered value, even for wines that cost more than $15. This Basque white, made mostly with the local hondarrabi zuri grape, is a WC favorite. It’s dry (though some Basque wines have a little — but not offsetting – sweetness), as well as stone fruit, lots and lots of minerality, and just 12 percent alcohol.

• Wine glasses, one more time. These are for the beginning wine drinker, a set of six for $40 (and dishwasher safe).

• The cheap wine book is still available on Amazon; frankly, as timeless and as valuable as ever. Consider this the final shameless plug you’ll ever have to read.

Photo: “Crepes and mulled wine at the Christmas market” by austinevan is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

More holiday wine gift guides:
Holiday wine gift guide 2022
• Holiday wine gift guide 2021
Holiday wine gift guide 2020

Come on, Lifehacker — enough with the Internet wine “clubs” already

woman at computer
“Seriously? Free shipping?”

There’s a difference between quality cheap wine and wine cheaply made

Lifehacker offers some of the best lifestyle-related advice on the Internet (as well as the priceless “Out of Touch Adults’ Guide to Kid Culture” for those of us of a certain age). But it doesn’t always do wine well.

I’ve tried to fix that. Several years ago, its inestimable senior food editor, Claire Lower, asked me to offer some WC-style advice for Thanksgiving. “I really need someone who can make this easy to understand,” she emailed me.

But, then, sadly, the dreaded “Sorry. They’ve cut the freelance budget” email.

So I’ve tried, since then, to offer my unique perspective in the comments, lurking in the background when I see a particularity egregious wine post. There have been several of those recently, with pieces advocating buying wine from the kind of Internet wine “clubs” we’ve warned people about over the years.

Now, a couple of caveats. First, Lifehacker was recently sold, and its new owners seem hyped on cyber-commerce and selling discounted items through the website. So these posts may have nothing to do with quality wine; they’re just there because they’re cheap. Second, some of these wine “clubs” like to sue people. So my point here is about these clubs in general and not specifically directed at any of the sites that are recommended.

Hence. the WC’s guide for telling whether you’ll get quality wine from a site offering to sell you something that works out to less than $5 or $6 a bottle — and includes shipping. Because there’s a difference between cheap wine and wine that’s cheaply made.

• Have you heard of the wineries before? Typically, these kinds of wines are made to sell for these clubs, and the wineries may exist in name only. That’s a sign of wine cheaply made.

• Are the wines listed on wine-searcher? They probably aren’t, since they’re made just for the clubs.

• Are the vintages listed? And how old are the wines if they are listed? Wines sold through these clubs are often bulk wine that never sold, leftovers from other producers that may have been re-labled, or who knows what else. In this case, a 10-year-old bottle is a sign of wine cheaply made.

• Are there other purchasing requirements – the dreaded mail-order record club scam? Back then, you got tapes (or vinyl, even) for pennies, the catch being something called negative option billing. This made you liable even if you didn’t order the music after the first shipment, when the music and shipping cost more.

So, Lifehacker, I hope this helps. And if the freelance budget gets beefed up, I know some terrific $10 wine for Thanksgiving this year.

Photo: “Aerial view of a woman using computer laptop on wooden table” by Rawpixel Ltd is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

Ask the WC 40: Gallup poll, premiumization, RTDs

Bald Old Fat Man Doodles
“This is how every wine gets 92 points — pay attention.”

This edition of Ask the WC: More about this year’s Gallup Poll, plus premiumization and ready-to-drink cocktails

Because the customers always have questions, and the Wine Curmudgeon has answers in this irregular feature. You can Ask the Wine Curmudgeon a wine-related question by clicking here.

Hey, WC:
I saw what you wrote about the Gallup Poll and wine falling to third after beer and spirits. What does that mean?
I drink wine

Dear Wine:
Gallup’s annual alcohol survey offers some of the best numbers about what Americans drink, how often we drink, and who drinks. But, as one analyst told me, the survey’s numbers are more important when taken as a whole, and not necessarily by individual years. We can believe that about one-third of Americans don’t drink because that result has been consistent for decades. So that, for one year, wine is third isn’t as important as the trend over the past several years, when wine and spirits were mostly tied. The time to worry is when wine stays third, and the gap gets bigger.

Dear Jeff:
Aren’t you tired of writing about premiumization? If someone wants to spend $40 for a bottle of wine, that’s their business, isn’t it?
Stop whining already

Dear Stop:
Anyone can pay as much or as little for wine — or anything else, for that matter — as they want. My job is to find wines that offer value and quality. And if  providing that service is seen as whining, then what’s the point of wine criticism? Let’s just give everything a 92 and let it go at that.

Hello, Wine Curmudgeon:
What are these RTDs that I see in the liquor store? Are they really cocktails in a can?
Confused

Dear Confused:
Yes, they are, and they’re one of the hot trends in the liquor business (and one reason why spirits are becoming more popular). Now, why anyone would want to buy a cocktail in a can is beyond me, save for the convenience, since you don’t know the quality of spirits, the mixers and so forth. But I also won’t pay $25 for

More Ask the WC:
• Ask the WC 39: Drinking less, affordable wine, cheap wine
• Ask the WC 38: More about negative reviews, inflation, availability
• Ask the WC 37: Blog future, negative reviews, California rain

Photo: “Bald Old Fat Man Doodles” by psd is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

Ask the WC 39: Drinking less, affordable wine, cheap wine

women talking
“So what is this sober curious thing the WC is writing about?”

This edition of Ask the WC: More about young people drinking less, plus affordable wine and cheap wine quality

Because the customers always have questions, and the Wine Curmudgeon has answers in this irregular feature. You can Ask the Wine Curmudgeon a wine-related question by clicking here.

Dear Wine Curmudgeon:
What’s all this about people, and especially young people, drinking less? I thought drinking was a rite of passage. Is that some more of those bad studies you’re always writing about?
Don’t believe the numbers

Dear Don’t:
The numbers seem to be true, and are consistent across a variety of studies and surveys – fewer of us say we drink, more of us say we want to drink less. I got a release this spring with these numbers: one-third of us want to drink less in 2023, almost half are interested in going to a sober bar, and about one-third have tried alcohol-free beer. Yes, it’s difficult to measure drinking, but – as the blog’s official numbers expert has told me more than once – consistency does seem to mean something,

Hi, Wine Curmudgeon:
I keep seeing wines advertised as values at my package store that cost $30. What’s going on?
Looking for value

Dear Value:
More of the evils of premiumization, sadly. That’s pretty typical of of my emails – lots and lots of wines, from both PR types and retailers, touting wines that cost $30, $40, and even $50 as values. It’s so bad that one PR company pitched me a $30 booze-free wine – which means it’s $30 grape juice. Why would they think anyone would pay that?

Oh cheap wine guru:
Do you ever get tired of tasting bad cheap wine? I would imagine you taste a lot of it.
Palate cleanser

Dear Palate:
Oh yes – and the more I do this, the more bad cheap wine I taste. Most of it is a tinge sweet, very alcoholic, and the reds all pretty much taste the same regardless of where they’re from or what the grapes are. The whites do vary depending on varietal, though the sugar is there more often than not. But not to worry – that’s why I’m here, so you don’t have to taste the junk.

More Ask the WC:
• Ask the WC 38: More about negative reviews, inflation, availability
• Ask the WC 37: Blog future, negative reviews, California rain
• Ask the WC 36: Restaurant wine, holiday wine, past vintages

Photo: “IMG_7272” by JodiWomack is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

Ask the WC 38: More about negative reviews, inflation, availability

Two middle age business workers giving high five
“Thank you, Supreme Court. No more WC making fun of us!”

This edition of Ask the WC: More about negative reviews, inflation and cheap wine prices, and more laments about availability

Because the customers always have questions, and the Wine Curmudgeon has answers in this irregular feature. You can Ask the Wine Curmudgeon a wine-related question by clicking here.

Dear Wine Curmudgeon:
A serious question, after reading about negative reviews on the blog. Aren’t you afraid someone is going to sue you?
Curious reader

Dear Curious:
The Supreme Court heard arguments recently on a case that may end my negative reviews, as well as the various parodies I do on the blog. The court will rule, probably in June, whether commercial products are protected from satire, despite the free speech protections in the Constitution. Frankly, I’m aghast the case got this far, and it speaks to the corporate capitalism that’s so pervasive in our culture and that making money is more important than individuals. How anyone can rationally argue that this dog toy affects Jack Daniels’ image in any way is beyond me.  If the court rules in favor of Jack Daniels, and it wouldn’t surprise me if it did, then I will stop the parodies and probably the negative reviews. The toy’s legal quandary is not exactly the same as that of a journalist, but I can’t afford to defend a lawsuit to make that point.

Hey WC:
What are cheap wine prices doing with all this inflation?
Buys lots of cheap wine

Dear Buys:
Mostly what I’ve seen are prices up a couple of bucks, so a $10 wine is now $12 and a $12 wine is $14 or 15. Having said that, there is still a lot retail discounting going on. So, if the heyday of the $10 bottle is gone, we’re not paying that much more. Now, this analysis doesn’t include the various producers who are raising prices for no reason than to raise prices. But, thanks to any possible Supreme Court decisions, I don’t want to say what I think of that.

Hi, Wine Curmudgeon:
Is availability getting any better these days, after the pandemic and all of that?
Trying to find your wines

Dear Trying:
I think so. But, as always, I can’t guarantee it. Just know the blog’s guidelines: A decent independent wine shop in a good-sized city should be able to get almost all of the wines I recommend on the blog.

Photo: Krakenimages via Unsplash

More Ask the WC:
Ask the WC 37: Blog future, negative reviews, California rain
Ask the WC 36: Restaurant wine, holiday wine, past vintages
Ask the WC 35: Kroger merger, Fred Franzia, AVAs